Earlier this day my wife made me aware of statements shared with her by John Wells. At the time of his disclosures she was in his residence to pack up the personal effects of his step mother/aunt who had died suddenly. Please note that this trip cost her more than $400.00 in travel expenses and lodging but she was happy to do it for a friend (and, similarly, I was happy to pay for it). While there she was constantly being charged with moving furnishings and heavy objects by John. This she could not do being 4’8” and afflicted with arthritis, scoliosis and plain age. It did not stop John from expecting these activities from her. He merely stood in the room while she worked and he talked.
He spoke at length to complain about her husband, me, and how I owe him so very much. He explained how I stole ideas from him and also identified that he will soon be changing his phone number and though he would share it with my wife, she was asked to ensure that I never got it.
As it happens, I have need to change my own phone number due to it being published on the dark web after bad foreign state actors hacked my employer’s HR database. The spam emails and texts I am constantly barraged with are only a few of the issues that I am dealing with. His phone number changing and being denied access to it is not a problem for me. I have been ready to, again, cut all ties with the man. I say again because I had already done so several years ago. I was in a business venture with him at the time. His long-lost sister showed up and – to make the story short – ran a con on him. I saw what she was doing and tried to make him understand but to no avail. He did not want to believe it. He did, however, betray me and oust me summarily from his little venture. I decided then that I did not need his company and cut all communications with him.
Then his father died.
I decided that I was not the kind of person who leaves a friend (even a poor one) alone during such a time. Looking back on that decision I realize I was being sentimental. He was no longer a friend. He was, and remains, a selfish, ignorant, dishonest ass. When we were young this presented an aura of foolish innocence but over time has degraded to hubris and lack of self-awareness.
I reacquainted myself with him and tried to help him through a terrible personal ordeal. I spoke with other of our friends and enjoined them to also support him as best they could. I did note to John that I would in NO way Ever have any business dealings with him nor listen to his incessant self-aggrandizing with regard to said business ventures. That ship had sunk in the harbor.
For the next 6 or so years I have maintained a cordial, if strained, relationship with him. I continued to help him as best I could – breaking my own rules and putting time, effort and funding into some of his needs. I never asked for any of it back – and in point of fact I do not lend friends money. I give it to them. If it comes back… fine. If not, well, no hard feelings then. Other than money I lent him and taking a pistol I helped purchase for him as collateral nothing has ever come back. And that’s fine, truly. That was always the condition of giving him money. It was given. No shade on him for that. But time, knowledge and advice… it appears that those things were wasted on a man who cares only for himself and has the unconscionable gall to tell my spouse how I Owe him…
Over the years I have performed professional services for his benefit, paid for resources he consumed and spent absolutely stupid amounts of personal time stuck on the phone with him as he recounted previously regaled tales and complaints, trivial personal itineraries (I did not need to know his showering schedule, his clothing costs nor what he might make for dinner… every damned day) and outrages he had with other old friends. I cannot itemize the expenditures of time and money because I never thought it would be important. In point of fact it is not excepting to know now that they were never appreciated.
If I cared any more, I would say how sad it is that he has nothing to show for having walked the Earth. The rest of us have families and interpersonal relationships based upon mutual respect and affections. These things are anathema to a man like John Wells. They have no market value. He cannot capitalize them to his benefit. Therefore he does not understand why I prefer the intimate company of my wife (with or without additional partners along the way) to ANY conduct he may wish to share with me. It has, I think, angered him that I am no longer constantly at his beck and call. Those days are long gone. Now, they will never return and I will have nothing to do with the man after completing this open letter.
Perhaps it is that the death of his relative has the net effect of providing him with a decent bit of money. (I’ll be the first to say that I am glad of it as he has many long-unmet needs that only money might fix.) I will draw attention to the coincidence that he is actually in debt to Cory and Myself. For me it is a LONG unpaid bill of $7500.00 for work I did for him (and did not want to do and he made all the more difficult to complete). Today, however, he wishes to no longer know Cory and, as noted, myself. The timing of these facts is, of course, mere coincidence. We are well aware that we will never see the money. It has not mattered to either Cory or myself because the money would have meant something long ago but not having it will not impact who we are today. It is the principle that we are standing on, not the debt. We pay ours. John has never paid his unless there was something else in it for himself. That echoes most of our contact with John Wells; we had something he wanted to make use of… time, knowledge, money, relationships… He used us for what he thought he needed.
I am posting this letter for a few folks we know in common to pre-emptively answer any new lies he may have as to why he felt it necessary to no longer treat with me. I know it is not technically necessary as you all have known him and experienced him for years. Similarly you know me – at least distantly – and have a full grasp of my character. Yes, I admit that this letter is borderline boorish but I ask that you consider the provocation and be willing to forgive me for it.
Returning to my discussion with my wife; it began with her telling me she has blocked John’s phone number and will no longer speak to him. Her reasons are her own and, curiously, have nothing to do with hearing her husband denigrated by the recipient of so very much of his time and effort (which was not spent on HER…!). I will be sharing my new contact details with Cory. Rob is welcome to communicate with me but does not do so and I think having one less phone number to recognize will do him no lasting harm – although I have the greatest of respect and appreciation for the man. “None finer” is, I believe, an accurate depiction.
As for any remaining assets that I purchased for John’s benefit… I don’t want them but I wil not be making myself available to transfer them to him or his assigns. They have had literally years to deal with them. I will let them expire and that will be an end to it all. Forty plus years.
Signed,
RwH
Cc: Cory XXXXXXX, Rob XXXXX, et.al.